Honestly, my life feels like it’s been one long flash. A quick series of unfortunate events, all leading me right to this moment. This latest streak of bad luck following what I originally presumed to be good luck, but as it always goes for me. It was not,not even fucking close.

  Now here I am sitting in the back of a Law Enforcement transport that’s sending me to the one place no one wants to go. Prison, but hey, at least it’s not just any prison. This is the fancy new prison in space. It’s Space prison. Which, again if I’m being honest, sounds super fucking cool, until I remember that it is still prison, and I am still going there. Today, not tomorrow, not next week, not a month from now in the middle of September, but Today. Yeah, that sucks.

  I leaned back against the rough plastic seat—the kind that lines the back of every law enforcement vehicle. The ones they claim are easier to clean, despite having that weird grainy texture that seems designed to trap grime forever unless you hose the whole thing down. Scratches the hard to get rid of itches on your backside. Those kind of seats.

  Leaning back I just stare at the sky through the reinforced glass and think about how much I need to stop falling for life’s little tricks it just loves to play on me.

  It sounds ridiculous and trust me it kind of is but seriously, Every time I think my luck has turned around, BAM Life smacks me down and places a boot on the back of my skull. I should have known there was no way I was going to get out of this clean, It wasn’t even that I did something wrong. It was just a classic case of wrong place at the wrong time.

  I closed my eyes and listened to the large van slowly roll down the street. Heading towards the ICTC, International Corrections Transport Center, where I would get to be the newest person sent up to Tarturis. The aft for mentioned Space Prison. A fitting name for this fancy ass place.

  Tarturis was, as far as I had gathered over the last few years, the first ever prison in SPACE-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce, Okay, imagine I did the cool echo voice thing people do sometimes to be funny.

  OK thanks

  Anyway they found some massive asteroid on the other side of Mars that i guess must have been literally screaming. “I’m the perfect place to Incarcerate thousands of people for super cheap” well as cheap as space prisons go, anyway.

  What really fascinates me the most, was how painfully mundane the crimes were for the prisoners of a space prison. There isn’t like an entire cell block of space pirates, or interstellar rebels/ political enemies to planet earth. No literally its people like me who, Allegedly committed wire fraud, evidence tampering, evading police, resisting arrest, failure to show Identification, and Impersonating a peace officer. Which to be honest, I did do the last one, Kind of.

  To be fair though, does walking thru someones apartment saying “no don’t get up, this is police business, don’t mind me” really count?

  I mean I never technically said that I was the police, and it was police business, it was while they were chasing me so I was involved in the police business, or I mean I was the police’s business at the time. I don’t know the legal ramifications of that , or well again now I guess I do, its about 5 extra years tacked on. coming to a grand total of 45 years in Minimum security at the lovely rockin’ prison of the Asteroid Belt. This is going to be a long stay. A stay I think I’m actually going to enjoy, no more surprises. no more thinking I’m home free, only to end up right back on the run again. Nothing but a small room with maybe a roomie to keep company with. I’ll keep my head low, make friends and just coast.

  Twenty Minutes passed while I was contemplating my lifes twisted path to this moment, I felt us turn off the main road and begin to slow down. That moment you feel when your pulling up to a toll booth or a security check point. I heard the driver have a brief conversation with what i assumed was a gate guard, heard the rattling of a gate open and then felt the sensation of the Van pulling ahead.

  My pulse began to quicken as I finally came to the realization that i was on my way to the shuttle that would Transport me to my new home. this sensation was dragged out longer than I was expecting. I think they got lost or something because it took another fifteen minutes or so to park.

  The Drivers got out and I could hear them making their way to the back door. moments later it swung open hard, I could tell these guys were not happy to be doing a prisoner transport on one of the hottest days of the year.

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  “Yes Jeeves?” I quipped in a snooty uppity rich guy voice. “Have we finally arrived? I say, we must get some proper seating back here, my ass nearly fell asleep dear boy, and that will simply not do.”

  “Get out of the van wise ass, your Earth days are over, Time for you to hit the Rocky Road” The first officer said. The second one deliberatively smacked his own face with an open palm and slowly ran it down in frustration.

  “Seriously Mike, ‘Rocky Road’? Let me guess, because the Prison is a giant rock in space and he’s about to go on the ‘road’ to it?” He did finger quotes around the word road.

  “I mean yea, but its not as funny when you explain it, or try to explain it anyway” Mike the Peace Officer said disappointedly. “I was just trying to have a little fun. Don’t need to be a dick about it.”

  “You don’t need to try and make everything a pun tho. We already had to chauffer this ass hat, master of Pompous attitude, around all day. Listening to his idiotic jokes, terrible accents, and hideous fashion taste.” He brutally spoke about me. Which I mean ouch, i get the jokes and the accent ,but hey this is my actual style. Which I liked how I looked. I was wearing Jeans, cuffed at the bottom, a pair of running sneakers, Asics practical shoes for distance running. I also had donned my Super Mario Bros retro Tee. the usual one of him jumping out of a green pipe while a Goomba and Koopa lolly gagged in the background. it was tucked in the front behind my Tri-Force belt Buckle . I also had had a pair of horn rimmed sunglasses on, which I didn’t anymore, because they took them from me earlier. I thought I looked kinda cool. like not popular kid cool but like the ‘He probably has tons of weird information to talk about, Cool’ which is definitely a kind of cool, whether you knew it was or not. No judging me, I looked cool, I think.

  “Hey, that’s kinda harsh man. I think I look cool” I said defensively

  “you would, now get out of the van or we are gonna pull you out”

  “Alright, alright I’m getting out.” I said reluctantly “So, is this coach or am I going First Class?”

  “Actually it’s laying down” Mike responded a little excitedly.

  “It’s w-w-w-what?” I questioned

  “They lay you in a Cryo Pod and medically induce a Coma for four years.”

  “Mike, why do you know that?” Unnamed Officer number one asked judgingly.

  “I like science, and it looked super cool. I was like ‘how does going to a prison 4 years away work?’ So i looked it up and it was all there explained in the website, along with some other cool stuff. Like did you know they also are starting up a internet series about-” he was cut off by us getting to the security check point.

  “Names and reason for entrance” Spoke this new cop, some middle age guy who had clearly been doing this and only this for the last few years.

  “Officers Michael Red, and Joseph Allen. Here for Prisoner Transport 117-Alpha to Tarturis. Prisoner is Nathan Stryder. Heading to a 45 year sentence.” The officer who was apparently named Joseph, which honestly made sense he looked like an average joe. Rim Shot Noise.

  The Officer at the checkpoint verified all this with the paperwork in Joes hand. ushered us through the doorway and pointed us in the direction of the gate, That would put me on my shiny new transport. Really it was a boring process getting on. Just imagine the airport but with your hands literally tied behind your back. because my hands were indeed handcuffed behind me. it was not comfortable in the least bit. ever need to scratch the back of your calf, with your hands stuck behind you. No? well I have. I fell over, I literally fell over trying to crouch down enough to get to it. I squirmed like a small dog trying to catch their masters hand as they were getting tickled. I got the itchy bastard, but Mike and Joe had to pick me back up.

  Finally, we made it thru Airport security, we checked-in, they did all their security checks on the transport , and after another half hour or so wait, they called me in. Two new guards for the flight came out to get me and I waved goodbye to my dear friends, officers Mike and Joe, that awkward little behind the back wave cause the cuffs were still on my wrists. The new guards walked me on to the craft and took me to a small room where the most techie looking bathtub slash test tube looking thing sat in the middle of the room. they finally uncuffed me, and told me to lay on the blue mat/bed in the middle of the Cryostasis Vat. A doctor came in a few minutes later to talk me thru the process.

  “You’re gonna do what?” I said in absolute shock

  “we are going to sedate you, drain all the blood from your body, backfill you with a nearly frozen saline solution, and transmit a radio frequency into your brain that basically puts you into hibernation for the next four years” The doctor responded like it was as simple a task as brushing your teeth.

  “Can I just stay awake the whole time? I won’t tell anyone if you don’t” I countered.

  “Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way, we Don’t bring enough supplies to sustain any of the prisoners for that long of a trip. Your the only occupant on the craft, The shuttle is machine controlled after take off and until landing. Human remote pilots see to the taking off and landing parts. everything else is AI. no one will be awake on the spacecraft after takeoff.”

  I was dumbfounded by his absolute bluntness.

  “Alright, fine shoot me up with your magic, long sleep juice.” I said defeated, as I lay down on the Cryostasis Vat. “Will I age?”

  “nope, your body basically freezes in place for the next four years as we make the trip. All around you technically will gain eight years to your life expectancy”

  “Dope, ok lets do it.” was the last thing I got to say on Earth. As they lowered the mask onto my face and I started to wonder what I would miss on Earth. probably nothing, more likely everything.

  A weird calm entered my body, this would be the last time I wouldn,t know what to expect. Well besides waking up, you always expect to wake up after going to sleep.

  Hopefully.