Luna was in a daze for the next few days. The genetic memories passed unwittingly from her mother visited trauma on Luna as though it had been she that had gone through the violence, the assault and the grief. She had been so close to breaking down completely that her unconscious state was a relief to fall into…but only nightmares had waited for her. She’d tried over and over again to hibernate, to return to a state where she couldn’t feel anything. But this time she wasn’t in an egg and the danger was not from outside but within.

  When she couldn’t bear the bed, the sleep and the nightmares any longer she’d fled to her world and gazed at the waters and the horizon that used to have far more land and much more life. It briefly occurred to her to jump and try to end her life but the dragon in her, the part she had inherited from her father, would protect her, causing her to change…

  …and then she would be responsible for the death of the little one she carried.

  Talking it out to Eustace helped.

  There were some things she couldn’t speak of and he didn’t press her for details.

  But after sharing it, some of the weight shifted from her shoulders.

  Bronwyn said not to worry about excess emotions as her body’s hormones were going crazy and she was probably more vulnerable to upsets than she realised.

  Jo said she needed good food to build her strength back up.

  Eustace and Rob maintained a close vigil on Luna…but it was James that really brought healing to her. He’d climb into her lap and her arms would go around him…and she let the tears fall until all the toxin in her veins, the foulness and traumatic memories leaked away.

  They gave the first baby meeting after the birthing video a miss but Luna insisted she was alright to attend them again. It seemed that they were not the only couple reeling from the video. When they went back, Tim had returned and did some encouraging and light hearted joking as if he was circumventing the damage done. Rather than delve into any deep facts, they played games such as tasting baby food and guessing the ingredients, some of which had all of them gagging. Then they did nappy changing on dolls, correct handling and Tim made them laugh by showing the incorrect way, such as a football pass to Gayle with the baby and how not to check if the nappy was dirty.

  All the couples were there, including Susan and Elinor who seemed to have resolved their argument…or were just resolved not to discuss it where others could hear it. Freya was there also, looking even more jittery than normal but by the end of the night, Tim managed to make her smile.

  Bethany and Jet’s wedding occurred three weeks later. It was held at House of Figs naturally and apart from the minister who left once he’d signed the certificates and witnessed the signatures, all were family and extended family of the unique establishment.

  There were elves, werewolves and humans as well as the two artificial lifeforms in Rob and Annie and Eustace’s dragon presence. From Atannica there was Abram, who conducted the bulk of the ceremony, Rafael and Adela.

  James fidgeted with a little boy’s natural desire to be active, especially when his friend, Elrond, was present. He was held firm on Eustace’s lap until the ceremony, which wasn’t long, was over and everyone began to gather for photos in and around the Observatory and of course, under the fig tree where the swing hung.

  Luna watched the ceremony, curious about the words that seemed particularly special to the couple that stated them. She admired the white gown Bethany wore and smiled at Jet’s obvious adoration for his bride, then wife.

  Adela assisted Faelan with the desserts, the young, ex-vampire, quite dedicated to sweet confections…or possibly the elf who made them. There were other elves from the village where Bronwyn lived and several humans from there too. Bronwyn had brought her husband, Asher and their two children, a mix of elf and human.

  Luna found it amusing that, while there were humans from three of the worlds that existed in the Observatory, they were very different to each other. Abram and Rafael were very smartly dressed in suits with flocked detail, cravats and polished shoes. Gwen was rustic with a wildness about her, red hair like flames tumbling down her back, her werewolf husband, Armin, sitting by her with their daughter in his arms. Asher and Bronwyn were also less polished than the Atannicans but more refined than Gwen’s clothing and Armin’s leather vest. Asher in particular looked roguish and handsome even with lines on his face from the sun and laughter. Bronwyn was still very elf like but she wore similarly styled clothing to Asher and not like Faelan’s pale green formal wear which was very elegant with delicate silvery embroidery around the collar, cuffs and down the front of the tunic.

  Eustace was in smarter clothing than his usual attire and it was taken directly from clothing of the real world. He still managed to look casual, his shirt not tucked in like others and his shoes unpolished. Luna was in a dress which she and Jo had picked out weeks before. It was boat necked and ‘sleeves’ but they split from her shoulders and hung loosely. It was a teal hue and she wore sandals on her feet, the only kinds of shoes she could bear to wear.

  After the ceremony, while everyone milled around, eating and talking, Luna found herself at a loose end. Eustace was helping Rafael with the coffee station and Annie was serving cold drinks. Bastian had platters of food ready for eating including plenty of bread and meat, his two favourite things…if you didn’t count milk.

  Luna gave the coffee station a wide berth. It caused her stomach to lurch in ways that made her want to empty it. Sometimes she couldn’t stand being around Eustace because he smelt so strongly of it after handling beans, grinding and brewing it all day. He’d learnt to go for a dip in the ocean before coming near her. However, when it came to meat, Luna was mortified that she could have quite happily eaten it raw. Apparently that just wasn’t done, at least not when you were pregnant or so the baby class told her.

  She drifted towards the gate that led to Rob’s house that she had come to think of as home.

  Of course it didn’t look at all like the home her mother had lived in. That had been on the cliffs by the sea, a wonderful sandstone and marble abode with archways and fireplaces, thick, plush rugs and tapestries depicting the four elements. With a wry smile at the memory, Luna recalled that the four elements were always around a central figure. A human…or so the arrogant humans had thought. They believed they were the centre of it all and created a dragon of all four elements…and managed to doom themselves with their brilliance…

  She heard muffled giggling and turned, half hidden by the hedge near the gate. Two people were pressed up against the side of House of Figs, out of sight from the main party because of the water tank. One was pressed against the wall and the other was pressed up against them. Then the human giggles began to turn to sighs and kisses that were growing deeper and longer.

  No, not just human giggles…Luna realised it was a human woman and an elf male, his long hair hanging down his back.

  Faelan?

  A sharp, low gasp snapped her out of her gaze and she spied Adela fleeing the scene, disappearing across the courtyard and then inside. Before Luna could decide if she should follow or not, Bronwyn appeared and with a cold word the impassioned couple pried themselves apart, apologising for their lack of restraint. Luna could see that while the elf resembled Faelan, it wasn’t he.

  Bronwyn shook her head then glanced at Luna, not surprised that she was there.

  “Too much, too fast.” She said by way of explanation. “How are you feeling?”

  Luna was mostly certain Bronwyn was inquiring about her physical health and not the way she’d felt when she’d observed the kissing couple.

  “I am well although the list of things I cannot stand to eat grows by the day.”

  “You are not long from your second stage,” Bronwyn promised, “usually a lot of those symptoms ease after the fourth month mark.”

  “And the morning sickness?”

  “That too although you are an unknown.” She smiled at her. “Felt the baby kick yet?” Luna shook her head. “You will and one day you will be wishing it did not kick so much.”

  Luna couldn’t decide if she was happy or sad about it. Her emotions just wouldn’t settle. It was like being on a turbulent ocean, not anchored to anything. “I think I will rest.” She nodded. “Goodnight.”

  “Goodnight.”

  Luna slipped through the gate, towards the house but rather than go inside, she went onto the veranda Rob had built and sat on something called a ‘love seat’ which hung from the rafters. From it she had a view of the cul de sac. She sat, swinging her legs and feeling herself gently sway.

  After twenty minutes the gathering at House of Figs moved into the front yard and they threw confetti and blessed Bethany and Jet as they made their way to their home which was only three doors away. James was waving in Eustace’s arms and twisted, catching sight of Luna. He squirmed until he was out of his grasp and ran up the steps to climb onto the seat. Eustace turned and saw her, striding up the footpath to the veranda.

  “Tired?” Luna was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. She couldn’t even muster a reply. “May I join you?” She nodded and he sank onto the love seat, hearing the rafters creak but remain steady. Rob certainly knew what he was doing. “Did you like the wedding?”

  “I did.” She replied. “It was lovely. Are all weddings like that?”

  “No,” Eustace smiled, “there are a great many cultures in this world and they all have their own way of performing a wedding. But House of Figs is certainly different. It’s unlikely there would be an elf or a werewolf, or a dragon…ex-vampire or robot at any other wedding in the world and certainly not at the same time.”

  Luna shifted. James was becoming heavier the longer he sat on her lap.

  “Here, he can sleep on my shoulder.” Eustace lifted him across and James put his thumb in his mouth and nestled against his father’s familiar form. “There won’t be space for him much longer on your lap.”

  Luna looked down at her slightly swollen abdomen. She was starting to ‘show’.

  “What are other weddings like?”

  “I’ve been to a few real world ones,” Eustace leaned back against the seat, causing it to swing out a little but his long leg braced against the railing so it couldn’t go far, “lots of colours, bride wearing white unless she’s being unconventional…lots of drinking and guests…”

  Luna recalled the ‘wall of fame’ at the community centre. They posted pictures of weddings that had been held there on one wall. The photographer would stand on the stairs with everyone gathered below and snap a picture. Every bride had worn white from memory.

  “What about weddings in other worlds?”

  “Haven’t been to an elf wedding yet,” Eustace said and Luna immediately thought of the couple that had been in the process of devouring each other before Bronwyn interrupted, “actually, now that I think about it, the only other world wedding I’ve been to is Bastian and Elke’s. You were there too.”

  “Elke did not wear white,” Luna recalled, “but she looked like a bride. What of Armin and Gwen?”

  “Oh,” Eustace cleared his throat, “well…in their case and in most werewolf cases, it’s not a wedding so much as mating.”

  “Mating…”

  “What we did…as dragons…”

  “Yes,” Luna’s cheeks flamed, “I remember.”

  James gave a little gurgle in his sleep. The wedding guests were leaving or staying to clean up. Eustace caught Jo’s eye as she was sweeping but she shook her head and waved him down.

  “I don’t suppose you know what humans in your world did?”

  Luna shook her head. “No, I don’t.”

  Eustace swallowed. “And what we did…”

  “Pure instinct…”

  “I know but was that all it was?”

  Luna was as surprised at the question as Eustace was in asking it. They both avoided each other’s gaze.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Was there anything else besides instinct? Were you…at all, attracted to me?”

  Luna tried to remember. She tried to conjure the fearsome impulse she had experienced when in the water with Eustace while they were both dragons. He was lithe and strong…and the alpha of his kind, of which there were admittedly only two and the other was his son…but he was also the lord of dragons.

  “As a dragon?” She asked hesitantly.

  “Sure.”

  “You were the only available mate,” she admittedly quietly, “without any other to compare you too…”

  “Oh…”

  A cold breeze was blowing. Luna shivered.

  “And…as a human?”

  She closed her eyes. She couldn’t answer that.

  But it seemed her silence was answer enough.

  “I see.”

  She would have apologised if she could have mustered the courage but she sat there like a fool until he made some excuse about putting James to bed and left for his world…

  His world…not hers. She couldn’t be there now and she wasn’t sure if she would have a place there after…certainly not if her baby was inherently human. It wasn’t safe for non dragons to live there.

  Luna stood up and went into the house. Rob was working in the kitchen, setting cabinets around the fittings. He looked up as she picked up her shawl and wrapped it around herself. The larger space in the house was generally cold because Rob didn’t require heating.

  She could see him starting to formulate a ‘query’ and headed it off.

  “It was a lovely wedding.”

  “Indeed,” Rob blinked, “query, are you going to sleep now?”

  “I could probably sleep through the world ending I’m so tired.” She felt faded and washed out. “Please don’t stop because of me.”

  “You are not an inconvenience.” How strange that such a small comment could prick her so deeply. Tears began to build in her eyes. “My comment was not meant to wound you.”

  “I know,” she sniffed, “must be these strange hormones…I am not sure I will get used to them.”

  “If you require anything, please let me know.”

  “Thank you.”

  Bronwyn was right about the hormones and strange cravings settling down after about three or four months. Luna found she could be around coffee again and liked to sit in the café sometimes, watching the comings and goings of the humans of Glenwilde. She was mightily relieved she stopped wanting to cry at every little thing and more than anything, the waves of morning sickness ebbed until only the most offensive smell triggered her retch impulse.

  Luna’s belly was really starting to protrude. She was beginning to look properly pregnant even if on the small side. When she was in the café sometimes a pregnant woman would ask her how far along she was and if she knew what she was having.

  Luna’s response of ‘a baby’ might have made them laugh but it was the truth. She wasn’t having a dragon or even laying an egg that the dragon could form inside. She was having a baby. One day she was looking through a book about babies, struggling with most of the words but trying to decipher their meaning from the pictures, when Rafael stopped by her table.

  “Here,” he said gruffly, “I made you cup of chamomile tea.” When she looked up at him in surprise he added, “I read somewhere that it’s safe for pregnant women…”

  “You read it?”

  “Yeah, you know…in a book.”

  “What was the book?”

  “Something about pregnancy…” He seemed embarrassed to have been caught out reading about her condition. He put the cup down and went back to his station. Bethany sidled up to Luna who was a touch surprised.

  “That’s his way of being nice.” She whispered.

  “Oh.” Luna picked up the cup and inhaled the scent. It was strong but not unpleasant and the colour of sunshine. The warmth of it went right down to her toes on such a cold morning and she gazed at Rafael, hoping to catch his face to smile at him. It took a while for him to look up because he was so intent on his job so she ended up studying his features, his sharp cheekbones, his straight eyebrows…the way he squinted a little as he worked, still adjusting to human eyesight after vampire telescopic vision had been removed from him. He was angular, as sharp as his cheekbones and as straight as his eyebrows. To embrace him would probably be like hugging a piece of glass…but Luna wondered what it would be like…

  She blinked, surprised at the place her train of thought had taken her. She returned to her book and tea, keeping her eyes firmly on the pictures.

  “One HoF special, with all the things you couldn’t eat before,” Bethany set the plate down, “and Faelan asked if you would try this caramel tart. He made it from scratch but wasn’t sure about the consistently.” Bethany leaned close. “Personally I think he’s just being pedantic.”

  She glanced back at the dessert counter where Faelan was giving her his version of a withering look. Of course because he was an elf, withering looks were mild and of course, because of his ears, he heard everything Bethany had said, hence the withering look.

  Luna enjoyed her meal. She had rediscovered her appetite now that the nausea was all but gone. Perhaps she mightn’t lose weight like other humans but she could deprive herself of nutrients which would hurt the baby. Her favourite part of the meal was the meat and Bastian had made sure to make it as tender as he could, keeping within guidelines for her condition.

  She glanced at him as she ate, his tawny hair having grown long enough to be tied back from his face. He had skin that looked like he was made from warm honey and full lips that liked to smile to one side, showing off his fangs when in good company. His wolf ears were hidden, as was his tail and any other wolfish traits that would give him away but there was no doubt he still retained an air of wildness and sensual strength. He cooked with flair and drama, causing Faelan to chide him frequently. Unlike Rafael, Bastian liked to look around as he worked and he caught sight of Luna’s gaze. He gave a wink and Luna felt it go straight through her, like an arrow pinning her heart to the wall behind.

  She tried to quietly laugh it off but her pulse had quickened and she hoped it would settle down.

  After the main meal she set about testing the caramel tart for Faelan. The base was beautifully crumbed and had an almost toffee like brittleness that contrasted with the warm, thick caramel that lay on top of a bed of sliced bananas and the tart was lightly sprinkled with salt that made the flavour pop.

  Luna found herself wishing that she could taste test more of Faelan’s creations as she scraped the plate clean.

  “How did you find the dessert?” Faelan asked when he came by to collect her plate. Bethany had finished early for the day.

  “I could have eaten ten times as much.” She admitted.

  “I have more if you like…”

  Luna reached out and clutched at his sleeve as he made to leave. “No, no…I am not paying anything for these meals as it is. I am happy to taste test. I was just trying to pay a compliment.”

  Faelan smiled and nodded at her, his pale gold hair tied strategically over his ears. His eyebrows were pale too and arched almost like the string of a bow when it was fully drawn. His eyes were like green shoots of new bulbs and there was something natural about him, like the smell of rain in the air which filled Luna’s nose with the scent, causing goosebumps to rise across her arms and up her neck.

  She blinked, having missed what he said. “Sorry?”

  “I just said I need my sleeve back…”

  Luna realised she was still holding onto him. “Sorry!” She gasped again and let go. Faelan smiled to show he wasn’t offended and returned to his station with her dirty crockery.

  Luna got to her feet hastily and slipped out the back of House of Figs. During winter the courtyard was not open to sit down guests. It was the perfect place to retreat to and pat her cheeks, wishing the flush that had struck her so hard would dissipate.

  “What is wrong with me?” She almost rasped. Every man she looked at recently was becoming the most desirable one she’d ever laid eyes on. Every virtue and feature, no matter how small, was suddenly irresistible. Her dreams weren’t helping either.

  Luna felt wretched and out of control…and deeply uncomfortable.

  Eustace was oblivious to Luna’s distress, working efficiently at the window counter, making sure customers had their hot coffees in their cold hands as soon as possible. It was a very cold day and the temperature only made the customers more irritable. He heard Bastian chuckling behind him but kept working until he couldn’t stand the low rumble any longer.

  Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

  “Someone ask the werewolf what he finds so funny!” He demanded softly as he reached for more milk.

  “Seeing as he’s looking at you when he laughs, you ask him.” Rafael retorted sharply.

  Eustace twisted and caught Bastian’s wicked look. “Is this something that can wait or that I’m going to care about?” He lifted his chin to look past him. “Annie, I need more takeaway cups.”

  “I will fetch another box from the cellar.”

  “Blast, wrong beans…” Rafael squeezed past Bastian and Faelan, heading for the cellar. “Annie, hold the door…”

  Eustace enjoyed the pleasant crack as the plastic ring came off the bottle of milk, still working quickly as everyone seemed to need an afternoon fix. The line at the window was long because the café was full. No outdoor seating during the colder months.

  “Yes and yes by the way.”

  Eustace eyed Bastian who couldn’t wipe the smug smile off his face.

  “Are you really going make me ask?”

  “Well…I was waiting for an opportune moment…” Bastian leaned across where Rafael would normally have stood. “You and Luna…are you still…togethering?”

  “Togethering?” Eustace demanded. “What does that even mean?”

  “I believe Bastian is asking if you and Luna are engaging in…”

  “Got it!” Eustace blurted before Rob, who stood at the head of the counter near the door to handle logistics and payments, could finish. “Don’t need any more clarification, thanks Rob.” He turned and glared at the werewolf. “Talk about inappropriate timing!”

  “I will discontinue listening to this conversation.” Rob announced.

  “No, no, there’s no conversation to discontinue.” Eustace blurted but Rob had tuned his voice out. Eustace groaned. “What made you ask such an impertinent question?”

  “Only that I think Luna’s entered that glorious stage in pregnancy when she’s…quite…” Bastian pretended to be stumped.

  Eustace heard Faelan say, ‘hormonally aroused’, under his breath.

  Immediately his face flamed to red. “That’s none of your damn business,” Eustace snapped, “and besides, how could you know?”

  Bastian gave a smirk and to Eustace’s dismay, even Faelan looked a tad condescending.

  “She’s giving off vibes of a special kind.”

  “Vibes…” Eustace grouched, frothing milk too fast and hard and burned it. “Crap!” Then he flinched. “James, if you heard that…and damn…please don’t ever repeat them.” He slid the jug of milk down the counter where Faelan caught it and dropped it in the sink. “Bastian, could you not talk about this now?”

  “Now is when it’s happening.” Bastian insisted. “Elke went through the same thing. For weeks I’m repulsive…”

  “That I understand…” Faelan muttered.

  “And suddenly she can’t get enough of me. Rob, order for table three.” Bastian waved his hand in front of Rob’s face because the robot was not listening. “Table three!”

  “I can understand that…owing to hormonal imbalance.” Faelan added.

  Eustace hesitated. “You’re both out of your mind.”

  “As much as I dislike agreeing with the werewolf,” Faelan tilted his head, “he is not wrong in this instance.”

  “I can imagine Bastian noticing something like this but how could you possibly pick something like this up?”

  “She is not subtle.” Faelan admitted then arched an eyebrow at Eustace’s furious expression.

  “Take that back.”

  “The elf’s right.” Bastian caught sight of Rafael returning with his beans and Annie bringing the know takeaway cups. “It wasn’t meant to embarrass you…only to encourage you that now might be a good time for some…bonding.”

  “I’ll bond you to the back of a fire dragon…” Eustace growled.

  Rafael slipped in between them with the fresh bag of beans and glanced back and forth. “Did I miss something?”

  Luna avoided Eustace as much as she could, citing that she was tired and in need of an early night. She enjoyed a shower in the bathroom Rob had completed in record time because she was staying there. The water trickled down her body, caressing her abdomen which was swelling little by little each day. Her white hair hung in thick strands when wet and when she dried it roughly, it liked to frizz out into an unmanageable mane. Instead she squeezed the water out as best she could, combing it until it was straight then had to leave it to dry. She dressed in sleep pants and a matching top, pulling bed socks on to protect her feet.

  She smiled sadly. No wonder she was always exhausted. She wasn’t just learning about being pregnant. She was learning about showers and beds and eating and walking…and drying her hair and bed socks…

  All of which should have kept her amply distracted from admiring the guys in the café.

  Luna moaned softly into her towel.

  There came a knock on the door. “Query, Luna, are you unwell?”

  She opened the door, Rob standing at the threshold looking like he was prepared to knock the door off its freshly bolted hinges.

  “I am fine. Sorry for interrupting you.”

  He nodded, unperturbed that she had bothered him during his work. Along a portion of the back wall he was building wardrobes that disappeared behind sliding doors. The wardrobes could contain a variety of things on its many shelves and in its many drawers. But the biggest things were the washing machine and dryer. However, until they were able to be purchased, there were large gaps where they would eventually go. And most of the shelves were empty.

  Luna shook her head in amazement. “There was nothing on this wall a week ago…you are remarkable, Rob.”

  “I cannot take pleasure in abilities which are unnatural…and I simply cannot take pleasure in anything.”

  She watched as he used an electric screwdriver to attach metal pieces to the side of a drawer, allowing it to go into the drawer and slide in and out so softly Bastian would have trouble hearing it.

  Rob nodded at the work then turned to her. “Query, are you wanting to rest? Query, would you like me to stop?” Luna shook her head. Rob continued working. She took five paces and was in the kitchen. Though the big electrical items were yet to be installed, there was a sink with working plumbing and power for a kettle. She made herself a cup of black tea in the only mug in the kitchen. She turned and leaned against the kitchen counter, holding her cup, watching Rob. He was strong and sure, not needing to look where he’d put the screwdriver down and everything he’d measured and cut fit perfectly. It was like watching him assemble a work of art…but Luna found herself becoming more and more fascinated by his robust figure, the strong line of his jaw, the steadfast concentration in his eyes…even the way his brown hair fell across his forehead, a little smudge of dust across his cheek.

  She moved towards him, into his workspace. Rob was immediately aware that she was close and turned. “Query, do you need something Luna?”

  She reached up, her sleeves a little long so she could pull one over her hand and wipe at his cheek, gently buffing the smudge away.

  Then she met his gaze. His brown eyes, unremarkable perhaps when Rafael’s ice blue, Bastian’s amber and Faelan’s pale green eyes were so striking, caused her heart to flutter wildly. His lashes were black and thick, framing his eyes with a natural, striking line. Her mouth dried out as her body began to tremble with anticipation. His lips were moist and perfectly kissable and she found herself drifting towards him, the hand on his cheek sliding around to bury itself in his chocolate locks.

  “Luna…” She leaned up to kiss those warm, soft lips when he stumbled backwards, awkward and ungainly which was something he never was. “Luna, I must ask you to stop.”

  She stared in astonishment at him…astonished that the last few seconds which she thought were all in her head had actually happened. Rob did not blush or become agitated but he kept a sizeable distance between them.

  Words were useless. Luna was so embarrassed. She sank to the bare floor, her hands over her face, sobbing shamefully. Somewhere, amidst the weeping, she managed to blurt out that she was sorry.

  “I don’t know what’s wrong with me! I just…I need…” Her body was flushing hot and cold all at once. “Rob, I’m so, so sorry…”

  Nothing happened for a long time then she heard the kettle switch off. A minute later came the sound of crockery on concrete directly in front of her. Luna peeked out between her fingers and saw her teacup had been replenished.

  She looked up in astonishment at Rob who stood nearby…but not too close. “Your tea was cold.” Luna began to blunder out another apology. Rob held up his hand. “I will never tell but I must ask that you never attempt that again. I…it was…”

  Luna realised he was faltering, a completely out of character trait for the emotionless artificial man. She lifted her puffy gaze and saw a flicker of something across his face. Shame?

  “Never again.” She vowed, her voice calm despite her angst because she could not, would not, hurt this man. He seemed as though he was impervious to hurt because he didn’t possess emotions and yet Luna was suddenly aware he could still be harmed.

  “Thank you.” He nodded and a length of silence drew out between them. “Perhaps, when you attend the baby meeting tomorrow evening, you might ask about these mood swings.”

  “I don’t think they can do much for dragon sized hormones…” She said miserably, hating herself.

  “Even finding out others have suffered similar moments might ease your burden.”

  She nodded and finished her tea. “Thank you. I will go to bed now.” She put the cup in the sink and walked to the bedroom. She paused and looked back at him. “Rob…I hope I haven’t hurt…us…”

  “Query, us?”

  Luna cringed. She realised she needed to clarify. “Our friendship. I…trust you a great deal. You’ve been so steady while I’ve been all over the place. Maybe that’s why…”

  “Query, you felt safe enough with me to attempt…”

  She shook her head, her now dry hair drifting back and forth. “I fell apart…lost control…and you were there for me…to stop me.”

  Rob nodded his head in a small bow. “You are welcome.”

  The following night Luna attended the baby meeting alone. She managed to convince Eustace that she needed at least one evening where she could ask questions he couldn’t hear…and that he also couldn’t hear the answer. She promised to be on guard and careful.

  But when she found herself at the entrance to the community centre, Luna was suddenly very nervous. She wished she had Eustace with her. She wished Jo had been able to come. She wished she could stop thinking about how she had tried to kiss Rob. Thankfully the rising tide had ebbed a little giving her a reprieve. However, she wasn’t sure it was a permanent lull.

  “If others experience this then I am normal.” She murmured, climbing the stairs in her leggings and flat walking shoes, a long knitted top in pale purple keeping her warm.

  “Oh Luna, purple is your colour!” Gayle greeted. “On your own tonight? Don’t you worry. We’re talking about feeding your baby, breastfeeding, formula and an honest to goodness poo chart. It’s a scream.”

  Luna couldn’t imagine screaming about defecation…unless it happened at an importune, public moment…and took her usual place in the circle. Tim talked light-heartedly about the contents of nappies and when and when not to panic.

  “The main thing is that they are filling their nappies fairly consistently.” He explained. “After all, if you’re breastfeeding, it’s hard to gauge how much they’re taking in. Much easier with a bottle that has measurements marked on it.”

  “Formula is pretty good these days, though right?” Susan asked strongly. “I mean, it doesn’t have to be breastmilk.”

  “We’ll always advocate and encourage mothers to breastfeed. You just can’t get any better than breastmilk.” Tim replied firmly. “However, sometimes health issues interrupt the milk process,” Freya looked down and pulled another thread loose on her jumper, “for some mum’s who need to return to work, it’s easier to have formula on hand rather than constantly expressing milk…whatever you decide to do and works for you and your life, we will support.”

  Luna had a sudden and uncharacteristic urge to ask if dragon milk would be appropriate for babies. She clamped her teeth together even as her lips curled into a slight smile. For the next twenty minutes she learned more about her breasts than she ever thought possible. And for a moment she felt melancholy, wondering if her mother had the chance to feed her.

  She didn’t know exactly when she’d been hidden in the fortress. Her genetic memory inheritance from her mother stopped after she was born. She must have been old enough to consume real food. How did the dragon mother feed her? Had the fortress become ruined over time, losing stores and food?

  What if the dragon mother hadn’t swallowed her?

  Luna had a remarkable revelation that she might have died of old age in the fortress and never known Eustace or James or Rob or House of Figs…

  “…Luna?” She realised everyone was staring at her. “You were a million miles away.”

  “About six days flying time…” She said before clapping her hand over her mouth.

  Everyone laughed. Luna made sure to be in the room and not lose focus again. When the meeting was over she approached Gayle. She was sure Tim could help her but everyone liked talking to him. He was very personable. Luna had more of a chance to catch Gayle alone.

  “So, six days flying time?” Gayle teased. “Concord or a rocket ship?”

  “I meant six days as a dragon flies.” Luna said and Gayle laughed brightly.

  “I’ll have to remember that. Did you want to ask something?” Luna nodded, trying to find the right way to begin. Gayle caught her hesitation and gently manoeuvred her away from the main group. As none of them possessed dragon, elf, werewolf or artificial hearing, Luna hoped their conversation would go unheard. “Whatever you tell me or ask me I won’t ever divulge.”

  Luna pressed her lips together and took a deep breath. “Lately…I’ve been feeling…I…I’ve been having dreams…passionate dreams,” Gayle nodded, her eyes gleaming with understanding, “and if that is where it ended, I would not be concerned…but during the day…” She fidgeted with her sleeve like Freya did.

  “You’re about four…four and a half, maybe five months?” Luna nodded. “Perfectly normal.”

  “It is?”

  “Well…if ‘it’ is that you’re feeling aroused, stimulated…randy, ruttish…then yes, perfectly normal.”

  Luna couldn’t understand how calm Gayle was about it. “What do I do?” She asked desperately.

  “I say enjoy it. Sex is perfectly safe while you’re pregnant.”

  “With who?”

  “Eustace…” Gayle’s voice fell away as Luna blanched. “Oh…Luna, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed. I saw the two of you together…I take it he’s not the father?”

  “He is,” Luna almost whispered, “but we are not…it’s complicated.”

  “I rarely meet a couple whose life isn’t complicated although I know that’s not much comfort.” Gayle breathed in deeply. “Luna, it will pass. I promise. And you are not a freak, you are not mad for it or out of control…you’re just a woman who, after the first trimester of blurgh, you’re riding a hormonal high. A little like the cravings you had or still have, you can choose what to do with them.”

  “I can choose.”

  “Of course. It’s your body. It may not like the ‘no’ word…who does? But you can choose.”

  Eustace was tempted to wait for Luna at the mouth of the cul de sac but was worried that might be too coddling. After all, Luna specifically wanted space that evening. He didn’t want to be inside and unseen because that might come across as not caring. So he sat on the veranda steps where the takeaway customers would walk down with their piping hot coffee, able to see along the path and through the wrought iron fence. He knew Luna would come up the side of the cul de sac where Bethany and Jet’s house was.

  He tried not to wonder about what it was she had asked Tim or Gayle…or the whole group at the meeting. Was it about him? Was it about her? Was it about the baby? What was it he wasn’t supposed to know? Weren’t they in this together? Wasn’t he being a good father?

  A flicker of movement caught his eye and he looked up from biting his nails. Luna walked up the cul de sac, crossing in front of House of Figs, heading for Rob’s house. She caught sight of him when he stood and walked down the path.

  “Were you waiting for me?”

  “I…was…” Eustace admitted. “Is that bad?”

  “No.”

  He walked beside her to Rob’s house. “How did it go?”

  “Fine. Apparently I’m a ‘walking, talking lactation factory’.” She quoted glibly.

  “What does that mean?”

  “It had something to do with my breasts.” Eustace kept his eyes firmly fixed in front so as not to look at her. “My body can make milk for the baby.”

  “That’s impressive.” Eustace wished his voice didn’t sound quite so squeaky. “James started eating right away, chasing fish, taking in nutrients from the water. I guess human babies require more help to feed themselves.” He wished the baby meetings would make him feel more competent but the more he attended, the greater the gap between himself and full knowledge became. “Did you get to talk to Gayle or Tim about what you wanted to?”

  “I did.”

  Eustace was now starting to feel the edge of panic created by the unpleasant sensation of insecurity. “Did you get an answer.”

  “Yes.”

  Eustace walked with her up to the front door. “Was it…”

  Luna turned as his question ended before it had begun, standing on the threshold of the door. “Was it…?”

  “Nothing. Sorry. You went there to ask questions on your own so I couldn’t hear them so I shouldn’t be asking what they were. Goodnight.” He turned on his heel and started back down the steps.

  “Eustace…”

  “No, it’s fine.” He said hastily, trying to make a quick retreat. Luna gasped and he spun, seeing her clutch at her belly, one arm grasping the doorframe. “Luna?”

  “It kicked…I felt the baby kick!” Eustace’s jaw dropped open, frozen to the step beneath his feet. Luna’s eyes were wide and she had forgotten how to breathe…and then she gave another gasp. “Oh…it is! The baby is kicking!”

  Eustace bolted up the steps. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. It…I have felt something like it before but my body’s stretching and…oh…again!” She laughed brightly. “Yes, it is kicking!”

  Eustace wanted to touch her so badly, to put his hand across her abdomen but didn’t dare.

  Luna took his hand and pressed it to her belly. “Can you feel it?”

  “Just soft stitches in purple.” He admitted, the thick texture of the top getting in the way.

  “Here.” She drew the top up, the line of her warm leggings beneath her belly, smooth, curved skin appearing with a dimpled bellybutton. “Your hand…”

  Eustace lay it across her skin on the top. She moved it around to where the baby’s kicks were connecting on the inside of her. They both held still, their breathing stalled as they waited…hoping…

  Then he felt a small jolt.

  “There! Did you feel it?”

  “I felt it!” He gasped, stunned at the notion that there was a little person stretching and rolling inside Luna. “That’s…” He looked up at her, his eyes bright and his face radiant with joy. “That’s incredible! Luna, you’re incredible!”

  Luna looked at him in wonder, the guilt and shame, the hesitation and doubt all gone in the blink of an eye…

  …and suddenly she found herself hopelessly desperate for him.

  She kissed him so fast he didn’t have the chance to recoil, his joy melting into passion as naturally as day dissolved into night. They staggered into the house, lips hungrily seeking each other’s, Luna’s skin on fire as he kissed down her jaw, her neck, his deep throated groans making her body shudder in anticipation. They were close to the bedroom and found themselves inside it, the door kicked shut by one of them. Luna pulled his shirt up, exposing Eustace’s muscular chest, hairless and smooth then ran her hands through his hair. Every touch seemed to send Eustace into dizzying realms of pleasure, his hands beneath her top, sliding across her skin.

  He spoke, his words muffled as she kissed them away. He drew back slightly, his eyes dilated and his cheeks flushed.

  “Wait,” he croaked, “Luna…wait…”

  “I don’t want to wait…”

  He pulled himself out of her grasp, heaving sharply. “Luna…are you…do you want me?”

  “Yes.” She said, her eyes glowing brightly.

  “No,” he swallowed, “do you want me? Eustace? Or am I…in the right place at the right time?”

  She sat up from the bed, her breathing erratic. “Eustace…”

  “Do you love me?”

  The question doused cold water over her as if he’d sprayed her with the artic tide of his world. Luna blinked, still shaking from the adrenalin.

  “I…”

  “Luna,” he closed his eyes, “please…I can’t do this again…I can’t be left feeling like…there’s nothing more. It can’t be over and it’s as if we never…” He gave a shuddering sob, his hand over his face. “I want more, Luna. More…not just the physical elation. I want it all. I want all of you…but not if you don’t want all of me.”

  “I want you.” She insisted as strongly as she could, her body still craving closeness.

  “And if someone else had been here instead of me?”

  The question was an ugly one. Luna wanted to refute it, to say only Eustace would do…but she knew after she had nearly kissed Rob and after admiring Rafael, Bastian and Faelan in the café…if any of them had been there in that moment…

  She couldn’t answer him. She couldn’t destroy him with truth…

  …but from the look in his eyes, he already knew.

  He walked backwards, bumped wall and sank to the carpet, his head in his hands. Eustace knew he ought to leave. He was too close to the moment, to Luna…to the physical demand in his body and her willing one only a few feet away. But he couldn’t.

  “Apparently it is a common thing for a woman in her second trimester, to desire closeness and intimacy,” Luna’s voice was low and sorrowful, “how is it that I can make something so beautiful…so hurtful?” He looked up tentatively. She was staring at the carpet, her brow furrowed, her lips quivering. “Is it…because…of my father…”

  “No, Luna…no, no…” Eustace wished he could hold her but didn’t dare close the gap between them even as tears streamed down her face. “I know you’re struggling between human hormones and dragon instincts…I didn’t mean to rebuke you. I just don’t want to be another…instinct…”

  Luna closed her eyes. “You want me to choose you…to choose to be with you.”

  “If I’m who you want…not just what you want.” Eustace swallowed, breathing in and out several times, trying to calm his pulse. When he was able to, he stood and went to the door, glancing back briefly. “I’m sorry. I wish I could be what you need…” He floundered, unsure what else to say then left.

  Luna slept badly, gnawed by guilt and wishing she was anyone other than herself. The only comfort were the motions in her belly that she now recognised as the baby’s. It kept her company, letting her know she wasn’t alone…yet even in that she was plagued by worry.

  “What will your genetic heritage be?” She murmured. “Will I mess you up like I’ve been messed up?”

  She didn’t dare to go to House of Figs. She couldn’t bear to be around any of them. Luna knew they wouldn’t condemn her but if anything that was worse. She had wounded a beloved member of their family and even though they would all understand and be kind, she didn’t think she could handle the wounded look in Eustace’s eyes.

  There was little to do but hide in Rob’s house. It was inevitable really that someone came to check on her. James, not stopping to knock, ran into the house with his bright beaming smile and his blue eyes that were so like his father’s.

  “Knock, knock?” Bethany called out, coming in. “Sorry Luna. Didn’t mean to barge in on you like that.” Luna shook her head, not trusting her voice. “I’ve got this morning off House of Figs. I thought you and James might like a change in scenery?”

  They walked down to Bethany and Jet’s house, a rather lovely home surrounded by a thick hedge that had consumed the fence. James immediately began to investigate every corner of the yard as Bethany led Luna into the kitchen.

  “Didn’t see you for breakfast at the café. Would you like something to eat?” Bethany browsed her offerings. “I’ve got toast, cereal…ooh, banana bread!” She pulled it out with triumph. “We should have this toasted with lots of butter!”

  Luna let her fuss, switching on the kettle and making them tea. “Did Eustace say something to you?” She asked quietly. “Or Rob?”

  “Rob didn’t say anything…but Eustace certainly wasn’t his usual self this morning.” Bethany put the banana bread into a sandwich press and put the lid down. “It wasn’t hard to figure out something went wrong last night.”

  Luna closed her eyes. “I just keep hurting him…over and over…”

  “We all know this has been a really difficult journey for you…”

  “Stop making excuses for me!” Luna exclaimed, her voice raising to a sharp pitch. “I am a horrible person and I don’t deserve kindness!” She dropped her hands and gave a frightened shudder. “I should have let the dragon mother kill me.”

  Bethany gazed at her calmly, looking snug in her muted blue cardigan, jeggings and boots. Her black curls were tied back from her face in a cascading ponytail and she had a content atmosphere about her that Luna envied.

  “Here,” she opened the press and took the banana bread out, “let’s sit in the sunshine.”

  On the back right corner of the house was a white gazebo with a swing seat not unlike the one at Rob’s house. James was still exploring, liking seeing the garden in the daylight. When Bethany and jet babysat him while Luna and Eustace were out, it was always at night. When he caught sight of them he hurried over and Bethany handed him a piece of banana bread. He stuffed the whole thing in his mouth and scampered off again.

  It was a cool day but the sunshine was pleasant and you could forget for a moment that it was nearly winter. Luna closed her eyes and lifted her chin, letting the light touch her face.

  “Do you want to talk about what happened last night?” Bethany asked softly.

  “It won’t undo what I did.”

  “No…but burying your head in the sand won’t undo it either.”

  Luna sighed, picking small pieces off the banana bread slice, popping them into her mouth.

  “Eustace and I, the times we were together as dragons, I felt disconnected from the process. It was just the right thing to do at the right time and so I did it.”

  “No pleasure?”

  Luna frowned. “I didn’t know pleasure was a part of it. It was…instinct.”

  “Procreation instinct.”

  “Yes.”

  Bethany nodded. “Not very romantic but in dragons, it sounds very practical.”

  “But not enough, I think, for Eustace. He wanted more…and we ended up making love as humans in the sand and surf.”

  Bethany tilted her head, studying her. “Any pleasure then?”

  Luna pressed her lips together. “It wasn’t unpleasant…but I still didn’t feel anything…” She twisted and faced Bethany directly. “When my father was with my mother, in the beginning, it was very pleasant and warm and…I knew she was happy…at first. I also know how repulsed and foul she felt when he turned vicious.”

  “Neither of those moments were like what you experienced with Eustace?”

  “No.” Luna rubbed her arms. “Even last night when things became…heated…I feel as though I’m still acting like a dragon, completely controlled by instinct.”

  She waited for Bethany to say something. Instead she ate her banana bread and looked thoughtful. James appeared for another helping then pointed inside.

  “Yes, you can watch a movie.” Bethany smiled at him and he skipped into the house. “He knows how to use our technology better than I do.” She leaned back and studied Luna. “What did she look like? Your mother?”

  Luna was taken aback by the strange question.

  What did she look like?

  Why did that even matter?”

  “I…”

  “Do you have any memory of her face in a mirror perhaps?”

  Luna concentrated, trying to conjure the memory. “She…her skin was warm like honey, perhaps a little darker than Bastian’s…and her hair…it was long and curly but not like yours. Smaller curls and lots of them…the colour of copper. And her eyes were teal with ribbons of gold in them.”

  “Yet you look like Eustace.”

  Luna looked down at her hands and recalled her face, her hair and her eyes. “I do…perhaps that is my dragon state. Perhaps that’s the reason I look like him as a human because I am a water dragon.”

  “But are you?” Bethany swept the crumbs off her lap. “Your father was the all elements dragon. It’s possible you could be the same. It would be quite the coincidence that you only inherited the water dragon element from him in a world where there are only two male water dragons.”

  “You think I took on the water dragon form because of Eustace?”

  “Another dragon instinct perhaps.”

  Luna stood and faced her. “What does that have to do with anything?”

  Bethany wasn’t afraid of her sharpening tone, gazing up at her. “For all the humanity in you, you’re defaulting to dragon every time.”

  “You’re saying I have to fight instinct? That I have to choose?”

  “I’m saying that until you know what it means to be human, you are going to struggle with instinct and choice.” Bethany smiled. “So before you condemn yourself too harshly, remember that…and maybe have a third person with you when you’re with Eustace.”

  Luna’s cheeks turned lightly pink. “Yes…perhaps that would be best. I am sorry Bethany…I am such a mess. I don’t know why he would want me to choose him.”

  “You’ll figure that out eventually too.”

  Luna was surprised that Bethany’s advice wasn’t all that helpful yet she felt the weight roll off her shoulders. She walked onto the lawn then turned and eyed the house.

  “I heard that Rob designed Jet’s house,” she said, hoping to talk about something other than her wretched state of mind and body, “but that something else made it.”

  “Ah’Man’s incantation.” Bethany led her back inside where Jet was thoroughly engrossed in a movie on the screen where bold primary coloured creatures did outlandish and clumsy things which had him grinning from ear to ear. “It’s in my head and that’s where it’s going to stay…” She looked upwards as if glaring at her skull and mind.

  “It must be convenient to be able to will something into being.”

  “You’d think so but no,” Bethany shook her curls, “it’s a very hungry thing and is quite wilful. It sucked En’Daren dry and started Gar’Dian on his long journey to write the books that would fuel the rebuilding of his world.”

  “Couldn’t it create En’Daren out of nothing?”

  “It needs something to work with. It’s not that clever.”

  Luna looked around at the house, the cupboards, the carpet and furniture, the big glass windows at the back and the passage that would take you to the master bedroom with its own bathroom, walk in robe and office. Bethany had made the house homey by displaying some of the gifts they’d been given for their wedding. There was an ornate plate on a shelf with a golden patina across its glossy surface. Luna traced its outline gently.

  “Abram gave us that. It’s from Atannica. One of the first pieces of pottery forged outside of vampire control.” Bethany could see Luna was almost entranced by it. “Do you like it?”

  “In the room where I saw my mother’s face in the mirror, I think it might have been a room similar to your bathrooms…there was a bench with a similar finish…smooth as water…hard as stone.”

  “It must have been a beautiful bathroom.”

  “It was a beautiful house.” Luna was surprised to hear Bethany rustling behind her in a white box. She pulled out paper and pencils. James was immediately delighted and began to colour. Bethany ruffled his hair then held a pencil out to her.

  “Can you show me?”