Fate Deals the Cards: Part 2: The Hermit

  Ch 7 Dust In The Wind

  “Skeleton dragon…” I stumbled on a few of the steps in that complex dance… It had to be choreographed around two concepts that were rarely discussed in spider society. The first idea did not arise often in conversation between beings without skeletons. The Arachneans also dwelt on worlds where dragons did not exist, even in mythology.

  Even less frequently were the two ideas considered together, so the steps were a little experimental and avant garde. In the end, it was just a jump to the left and then a step to the right…

  “Dracolich if you must be specific… Most dragon kin are touchy about the nomenclature.” The Necromancer muttered in a voice of hollow skulls rolling down a hill… or dry, dusty skin and flesh crumbling, when first disturbed by the living after eons.

  “I did warn you about the edgelord factor…”

  “That’s fair…” I sighed weakly, too thoroughly wrung out to even try any more. “So you’re a dracolich, an undead dragon wizard that can turn invisible and project illusions…” I finally grumbled, once I could stand and move properly again.

  “I began my new life as a zombie fire newt. That’s hardly more than an undead iguana that can spit sparks.” Necro mumbled, clearly embarrassed. “I just kinda…” He shrugged, which fanned his vast, tattered wings against the starry backdrop of the sky.

  “That’s crazy…” I whispered, the movements of my dance were so subtle that I barely disturbed the grass.

  “It is a much weirder universe than you suspect, brother.” Necro muttered in his creepy voice of life’s endings and timeless decay. “Danger and wonders await, out in the wider cosmos. Some of those dangers may come seeking you, whether you join us or not. In any case our brothers and sisters will aid you as ever we can, so long as you allow.”

  “I’ve heard things… something about a conflict with some church?” I asked carefully.

  “The temple of the divine light…” He sighed sadly. “A cult of demon worshippers, the clerics and upper leadership are almost entirely shapeshifters, undead, demons, possessed, or otherwise no longer human.” He shook his enormous, reptilian skull sadly.

  “Even more upsetting is the inescapable fact that most of the frontline soldiers and cultists honestly believe they are obeying the will of an actual god, rather than an opportunistic, disembodied, immortal asshole.”

  “And you guys are at odds with them?” I insisted gently.

  “The cult of light enthusiastically supports the slave trade on any number of worlds, which most of us find deeply objectionable, right out of the gate. If we look a little deeper, the cult is responsible for the deaths of more of our brothers and sisters than any other single factor across the cosmos.”

  He glared off into the sky for a moment, his dark and almost empty eye-sockets blazing with un-light and un-life in some pretty weird ways.

  “The cult practices ritual sacrifice; to raise undead warriors and summon their demon bishops into mortal worlds.” He paused to let that soak in.

  “Human sacrifice?” I asked.

  “Oh, not just humans, they will take any sentients for their rituals; they just prefer human virgins, especially children.

  We are among the best ritual sacrifice victims available in the cosmos, due to our unusual origin.” He remarked casually.

  “They actively hunt us, wherever we appear, so it’s less a matter of us being at war with them, than the cult wanting our sweet asses for non-consensual, eldritch butt-stuff.”

  “Huh?” The overall quality of my contribution to the discussion was steadily falling, so I settled in for one last question. “Why us?”

  “I think you understand very well why, brother.” He mumbled in embarrassment.

  “I really don’t understand, not at all.” I answered weakly, as the weight of the long day wore down my ability to think clearly.

  “We died on our world without ever… you know. Then we wind up scattered around the universe, usually lost and alone in the wilderness…” He shrugged his vast wings again, obviously hoping I would be able to connect the dots.

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  My blank, exhausted stare finally broke his will. “We are magical beings, newly born on whatever world we arrive on, but containing a complete, adult human man’s soul…” He grumbled. “We make ideal sacrificial victims because we have the soul of an adult virgin, in the body of a child.”

  “Virgins?” I asked softly, considering my dim romantic prospects, going forward.

  “Shut up, bro.” Necro mumbled awkwardly. “I don’t even have a dick; all bones, no boner.” It was really weird, watching the inner, angsty and socially inept, crippled nerd emerge from behind the facade of the mighty dragon lord of the undead.

  “Yeah, well… I’m not doing any better.” I grumbled sourly.

  “Anyway…” Necro sighed, after a few quiet moments. “Our kin are in deeply strange situations, all over the cosmos, scattered throughout all the dimensions and time as well… Some need our aid, desperately. Will you come with me and consider joining our little insurgency? No commitment, no pressure, just a visit to a local dungeon world, a brief meeting with the Magician…” He paused again, considering his next words carefully.

  “And then, if you wish, you can slip into the void and vanish forever.”

  “I have nothing holding me here… I do need to say goodbye to Skrithy and Klevin.” I sighed. “Let’s see what’s out there. No promises, though! I have no plans to join your private crusade.”

  “I will come tomorrow night to collect you…” Necro announced, once more sounding like an intimidating being of power and influence, rather than a lonely nerd lost in a big universe. “You should definitely accept the lordship of this dungeon world, if only to secure yourself a foothold here. In that case it will remain yours, should you wish to return.”

  “Should I come back here?” I asked quietly. “There aren’t any people to scare… I could just go full spider, I suppose.”

  “Some of us do go native and disappear into the universe, leaving our old life behind…” He murmured quietly. “Those who take drastically different forms like you and like me, often struggle to adapt. Just as often, society at large struggles to accept some of us, like me… and like you.” His draconic death grimace almost seemed to smile wryly for a moment. “We are both a lot to take, for most normies.”

  “Yeah, I get it.” I sighed. “Before you go… could I get your opinion on something?”

  The bony ridge over his left eye-socket almost seemed to quirk in curiosity and amusement. “Certainly.”

  I fumbled out my textile experiment and held the long, silvery scarf out for his inspection. “I kinda made a… a thing.” I mumbled.

  “Interesting… but not surprising.” He said in his low, quiet voice. Like a breeze from a ruined crypt. “Many of us find that we have gifts and abilities of unusual scope or potency. This artifact is a very complex working, yet it feels organic, almost chaotic and deeply natural.”

  He peered at me from his vast and disturbingly not exactly empty eye-sockets and grinned again. “This is for Klevin, the dwarf?”

  I nodded silently and waited for a few seconds, while the giant, undead lizard examined my creation. “This will allow a sightless being to perceive their surroundings by sensing atmospheric disturbances and passive echolocation… Those are spider abilities.” He finally grumbled. “You made this in the woods, in the last couple days?”

  I nodded again and remained silent, mostly because I was too tired to dance another word.

  “Bro, you are going to fit right in.” Necro rumbled, as he took flight. “See you tomorrow night.”

  Alone again, I stumbled up the cliff to my nest and settled in to rest for what remained of the night, though sleep eluded me until dawn.

  Once again, the mantis came calling, without Klevin. Skrithy picked up on my question before I could even muster the energy to ask.

  “Master Klevin has gone back to the Swarm Dungeon, to assist his friend there; since he is unable to translate for you… He sends his regrets.”

  “I wanted to thank him for trying… Could you arrange for him to receive a gift?” I held out the sash, neatly folded and tied in a sassy little bow.

  “It will give him a limited form of sight, if he wears it over his eyes.”

  “A splendid gift. His nephew is an Adventurer in the dwarven party, I will see that master Klevin receives it.” She muttered, taking the cloth and tucking it away. “I take it you will be accepting the necromancer’s offer?”

  “Yeah, he’s taking me off world tonight. I’m supposed to meet ‘The Magician’ somewhere.” I grumbled.

  The whole thing sounded crazy, when said out loud… But I wasn’t saying it aloud, I was dancing my worries, cause I was a giant freaking spider…

  “The Magician is the rumoured leader of the Tarots… None outside the core membership have ever seen him or her.” She gasped excitedly.

  “There is much speculation but there are no actual facts relating to whatever entity leads the Tarots… they refuse to even acknowledge that such an entity exists in most cases.”

  She preened her wings for a moment, a gesture of embarrassed and awkward nervousness.

  “Those denials are why we are certain that the being exists… Most of the Tarots are truly awful liars, it’s one of their defining traits.”

  “Uh huh… And what are the other ‘defining traits’?” I asked, just a little tartly.

  She preened her wings again and did a shifty, shuffling dance that suggested she would rather not answer. I kept staring at her two big, jeweled eyes with my eight dark orbs, until she broke under my gaze.

  “Madness, my friend… Most sentients find the Tarots to all be at least a little deranged, even by the loose standards of isekai in general and humans in particular… They are deeply strange.” She stopped moving after the last word, holding stock still, as her kind do when desperately uncomfortable or frightened.

  “Yeah, I get that…” I sighed finally, drawing a sigh of relief from my nervous mantis friend. “Whatever comes next, I owe you Skrithy… You’ll get your interview, I promise.”

  I waved goodbye, as I climbed back to my nest for a nap. I had another busy night in front of me and a few minor tasks to finish.

  Congratulations, you are now the Dungeon Lord of this proto dungeon world! Please designate a name and general theme for your dungeon.

  With more than a little grim humour I entered in the name of my new dungeon world:

  Arachnophobia, the Dungeon of Spiders, has been accepted.

  All non native sapient beings will be notified of your ascension and will be offered escape from Arachnophobia immediately.

  Commence random monster spawns? Yes/No?

  I selected ‘Yes’ and set a delay timer on the monster spawns for three days. A moment later, the announcement message went out to every sentient on the planet, warning them that their hunts were over.

  *Attention!*

  The Dungeon World Arachnophobia has selected its first lord. All non-native sentients must evacuate immediately, or perish.

  *Attention!*