By the end of their long winded and extremely convoluted spiel, Faiz was in awe at the Tubespawns shamelessness. Not only did they keep proclaiming their innocence, they managed to put forth a version of events where Faiz should be grateful at being able to be given the chance to go into the mind.

  “-and that’s why you should be kissing my tentacles with reverence kid! Actually on second thought you’re a tad young so I’ll settle for a written fan letter instead.”

  Faiz blinked. “You want me to be thankful that you allowed me the dignity of exploring the breadth of my challenges and height of my ability…by deceiving me and throwing me into a world beyond all coherence, and thereby exposing me to all sorts of natural and unnatural dangers…”

  “Yes.”

  “…and what if I had indeed died?”

  “Well, you didn’t and that’s what matters, but your sliver of the Empyrean would’ve been returned here anyhow. Either we get back a capable you, or no longer have to worry about you! A true winning proposition. Clever huh?”

  “Jesyll.”

  “Finally showing your appreciation kid? Alright, lay it on me.”

  “I…am so

  for you doing all this, because…It let me understand how to pulverize you better!

  He charged at the smarmy-and-suddenly-terrified bag of bile, only stopped by the other two once more.

  “You’re so angry! Are we sure you’ve not been replaced by a demon of rage?! I guess I shouldn’t reveal it was all for naught then…and I did anyways now..”

  Faiz paused, his eyes widening in disbelief, “What.”

  “Well..” The tubespawn started fiddling with the tendrils acting as its forelimbs, warbling slowly, “The plan…the whole ‘get permit for bribes and monster killing’ thing? Yes, so I er-managed to snag the key to the gate using another method. We can just go after a minor problem is sorted out, kid.”

  “…huh.”

  “You’re taking this well? Not going to chop me by my wriggly bits?”

  Faiz looked into the far distance as he stepped back, using Keite like a stress blanket, listening to his pleasingly squeaky cries as he sank his hands into the luxuriously soft fur on the other boy’s frame. There was a thoughtful look on his face as he spoke, “No, I’m just thinking…would anyone really miss you if I turned you into roasted skywhip stew right now? Nice fluff by the way, buddy…but yeah, at this point, I think I’m…done.”

  Ellery kept shifting uneasily, in spades unhappy it wasn’t the one being cuddled, and also because Faiz had fixed it in his gazes, “Jes! He’s…looking here. Kiddo, you can’t hate your pal Ellery can you? I gave you food before, remember? Do-do humans appreciate that?”

  Faiz shook his head, sighing, “I can’t believe I was actually livid at you two…what schemes and what murder plots? You nitwits wouldn’t be able to outsmart a Reaki of all things. One’s smug and full of deceit and the other is dumb and full of itself. What a beautiful pair you two make.”

  “Uhm…friend Faiz…? Are you mad at me too?” He tilted his head down to look at the unsure Keite, and intensified his indulgence in the snowy fur, “You haven’t done anything yet, flutterkid. Keep being a fluffball and I’ll sing your praises.”

  After a moment’s pause, he lifted his head back up and looked at the coiled mass of tentacles forming a facsimile face.

  “Jesyll. You mentioned something about a complication and a plan? I hope you’ll be a little more honest and tell me what that’s about?”

  The writhing being perked up, one of its tendrils urging Ellery, “I knew you’d see things my way, kid! Even if your tongue is sharper than the celestial blade…Big chap, come on! Roll out the charts, I must demonstrate!”

  “Which ones..? Oh, the ones you gave me last cycle! I’ll take it out, don’t you worry. This Ellery won’t ever forget a thing!” It was clear the scrapskin had in fact forgotten, and kept blabbering with increasing nervousness as it kept shifting into different shapes and producing random trash-how much could it even hold inside itself?!-and Jesyll’s tentacles grew more threatening.

  Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  “Ah ha! I have it now!” The lightened metal creaked one last time, as Ellery spat out a bevy of long crystalline shinescrolls into the many waiting limbs of the tubespawn.

  “I was worried I’d have to make an example of you, friend. Now, kid and smaller kid, look this way! The great Jesyll is going to teach you how to rob these prissy Ragan dwellers blind!

  Faiz lifted an eyebrow, almost amused, while innocent Keite gasped in shock. Faiz had to wonder, what was this kid even doing with these Noshro…Shrino.. here? He seemed completely untested and unused to any intensive acts, as soft and tender as a fluttery angel. Maybe he was used like a mascot? Certainly cute enough to fill that role.

  “I didn’t think my once great ship captain had grown poor enough to be robbing people of false coin. Your Chrinos confederacy finally going under with debt?” Why even try to steal a currency which was useless anywhere else except the place you’d be stealing it from?

  Jesyll unfurled the first chart, displaying it to him. On it was a bunch of complicated jargon, and a primitive drawing scrawled at the bottom, depicting a golden wealth sigil with an arrow sprouting from it, pointing towards the word ‘energy’. “Have patience, my ungrateful tagalong of weak faith! As you can see from my calculations, the money may not be real, but the etchings sure are! And they’re full of these sky-thieves energies, easily converted to power! And I must remind you, it’s the Rohsinar Order.”

  Ellery chimed (literally) in from the side, “Jes, maybe you should make it a bit easier to read? I thought charts were…supposed to help you know stuff faster? But I think it’s failing at step one?”

  “You would think that, wouldn’t you? That’s why I’m here after all, to know stuff you don’t, friend. Unbreakable teamwork! Now, how do you like this idea kid? Kid..?” Faiz had tuned out their bickering, and was busy playing around with his giggling fluffy friend, “Don’t be seduced by that softness already! You still have a lady love to get to, remember? Whole reason you came along?”

  Faiz growled and snapped at the tentacled irritant, “Jesyll…I’m trying to be nice, I really am…but you’ve given me no reason to pay attention to you! You’re too busy playing a thousand questions with me, and I’m tired of it all honestly. Either speed through your explanation or let me get back to my relaxation.”

  They wobbled, keening sadly, “No one appreciates the arts of mystery these days, all these youngsters want to do is get from one place to the next, cruel world…”

  “I don’t think it’s that bad, Master Jesyll~ You meet so many friends if you go around! I don’t know what doing this crime helps with either though, it’s so…mean!” Keite managed to string out a reassuring sentence in-between the severe petting he was a recipient of, oblivious to his master’s obvious melodrama.

  “I didn’t-ah forget it, my greatness is wasted here..” They brushed aside the other charts (doubtlessly full of even more nonsense) and composed themselves, “Fine, have your way then. In essence, I have the key to activate the gate now, but recently found out one of the slavers here shifted the trajectory of its rotation. Now it won’t align with our home base in any circumstance, unless we alter its course again. That needs a lot of power, hence our heist.”

  “Well, that hardly seems like an issue. Why don’t we just sail there, or you convince whoever gave you that key to shift it for us, instead of taking on all this risk?”

  “Oh, me and Jes had to try our hardest and best to get that little key too! I don’t know if we could pull out any more miracles anytime soon, kiddo!” Ellery had finished cleaning up the scrolls, and had turned into a puddle on the floor, from which it spoke.

  “What the big guy said. And as for sailing there, didn’t I tell you before that it was impossible? You must’ve forgotten, or got some jungle fever? Anyways, the basic scheme involves us breaking into the central hall of the Assembly of Ragan, wherein every sigil is inscribed with a sliver of stellar will. We haven’t the luxury to be sitting around, so our friend Ellery will take the pillar itself along. Then, at the gates, the little guy in your arms will use his abilities, change them all to power, and shift the gate. And then I use this key to open the gate and we’re home in no time!”

  “Me? Master Jesyll…is that why-“

  “Why we called you here, cotton-puff? Mostly that, yeah. It took me a lot of effort finding you close by, thankfully you were present where I’d told the placement cell to leave you be.”

  Keite was obviously saddened at being thought of in terms of use, and thusly snuggled tearfully into Faiz’s arms, quite like an upset Calyd. Faiz noticed a big issue with Jesyll’s master plan, “How will we get in an-ah. Let me guess…” His gaze lowered towards the shining lightdial on his wrist, “You’re going to make me carry us all in there. That’s why you didn’t call my name yet.”

  Jesyll burbled cheerily, “Got it in one! Bit of a shame you can’t access any arms yet, but a little movement never hurt anyone!”

  Faiz levelled a complicated gaze at the tubespawn and opened his mouth…before sighing and closing it, gently extricating himself from Keite’s grasp.

  “Judging by the expectation in your tone, I trust you need me to do something for you?” Sure enough, Ellery had already produced two long cloaks, and handed one to Faiz and the other to Keite.

  “Just some reconnaissance! One needs to have sufficient information to plan even a picnic, much less scheme a heist. You and the smaller kid go south, me and the big pal go somewhere else! Meet me here near the end of the cycle, or I’ll have to drag you here later!”

  Faiz looked down at the cloak in his hand, then at Keite, who was struggling to fit the hood of his own over those fluffy antennae, and then looked down again, sighing. Today was going to be a long day…