gayannabeth

  Small moment of trans ignorance

  [colpse]

  Inevitably, the weekend had to end. I didn’t spend all of it gaming. Just most of it.

  Saturday night, I was so engrossed in the game, that it was just after midnight by the time I finally got around to making supper. I went to the kitchen, then grabbed two slices of leftover pizza and put them on a pte. I was about to stick them in the microwave when I remembered that, oh, yeah, I skipped lunch. Better make it four slices!

  I set the oven to run for three minutes, then searched through my fridge for something to drink. Let’s see…

  I have:

  Cssic MonsterUltra Violet MonsterUltra Rosa MonsterOrange Dreamsicle MonsterPepsiMilkSome fruity alcoholic drink I wanted to try but kept putting off that had been sitting in there for around a monthTechnically, I should be getting to sleep soon… but…

  I grabbed the purple Monster.

  I could catch up on sleep tomorrow night, right? It wasn’t like I would be paying for my sleep deficit come Monday morning where I have to force myself not to nod off during Communication and Presentation Skills and remain focused during my and Olivia’s presentation. The definitely wasn’t going to happen.

  So, my past self sucks! Like, fuck that guy! What was he thinking? I barely managed to get any sleep st night, and now, here I was, sitting in Curtis Lecture Hall H, struggling to focus on the other presentations.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted Olivia giving me a worried look — although I wasn’t sure if she was more worried about me and my clear ck of sleep, or about her own grade on this assignment.

  Finally, the two of us were called up to present.

  The topic of our presentation: video games and violence. Obviously, video games do not cause violence. That was the entire point behind our presentation, after all.

  Olivia started us off. “It has long been argued that violent video games lead to violence.” She clicked a button on her ptop, and the slide changed from our title slide to show images from fighting games and Grand Theft Auto. “However, most actual research and data indicates that this is not actually the case.”

  “Yeah, they just turn you into a girl,” I said quietly.

  Olivia turned to look at me.

  “Oh, shi- shoot, did I say that out loud?”

  Olivia nodded silently.

  “Oh, fu- frick, sorry about that ma- girl.” I shook my head. I tried to remember what my line was supposed to be, but kept drawing a bnk. I was conscious of the eyes of all the other students and the professor on me. I gnced over at Olivia’s ptop, hoping that would give me some hint about what I was supposed to say.

  “Um, research has actually indicated the opposite; that violent video games can help reduce violent tendencies by providing people with an outlet.”

  From there, things went about as you’d expect. Olivia performed fwlessly, and I stumbled through my parts of the presentation.

  Once we finished up, I rushed back over to my seat, my face slightly flushed with embarrassment.

  And, to top it all off, my stupid nipples were fucking sore.

  Olivia sat down next to me. “What on earth did you mean by ‘they turn you into girls’?”

  I groaned. “Nothing. Just some stupid bullshit Harry’s freaking out over. He’s convinced his new video game is magically turning him into a girl somehow.”

  The next presentation — led by a tall pink-haired white girl named Hazel and a shorter bck guy named Mark — started up, but I was barely paying attention to it.

  Olivia snorted. “Dude, your friend is a nutcase.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You don’t need to tell me. At least the estrogen in the drinking fountains was possible.”

  “It would be a terrible method of delivery, to be honest,” Olivia said. “Injections are much more effective.”

  I let out a brief barking ugh. A couple students sitting nearby turned to look at me, but I ignored them. “Don’t let Harry hear you say that. He’ll manage to spin that into vaccines causing girlhood.”

  “Well, I got the covid vaccine, and I’d like to think I’m a really cute girl,” Olivia said in a faux snobby tone.

  I looked at her and- yeah, she was insanely pretty. Her gorgeous purple hair cascaded down her back. She was wearing light blue eyeliner today, which highlighted her cute brown eyes.

  “I totally agree,” I said. Then I realised just what I said and turned away from her, blushing even more.

  “Why thank you,” she said. “You’re not too bad looking yourself.” She paused. “Actually, you look kind of different now. Did you do something with your hair?”

  I froze. I… looked different. Was it possible that…

  No.

  Harry was clearly nuts.

  “Um, no,” I said.

  “If you say so,” Olivia replied.

  Harry didn’t have css on Mondays, so I was alone grabbing lunch. I debated between Pizza Pizza and Subway. I went with pizza, and went to order a slice.

  I sat down on one of the uncomfortable wooden benches to eat my lunch. As I scarfed down the delicious Hawaiian (which was actually created in Ontario) pizza, I spied out of the corner of my eye one of the guys from the css I was just in staring at me. Mark, I think. The guy who was presenting alongside the much more notable pink-haired girl, Hazel Lee. I turned to focus on him, which he took as an invitation to come up to me.

  “Weren’t you a guy st week?”

  I gave him a funny look. “Pardon?” What the fuck?

  “Sorry, just, you look like a chick, but I’m pretty sure that st week you were a guy?”

  I blinked. “Dude… what? I’m a guy.” I turned back to my lunch and ignored him.

  “Um, but, you-”

  “Mark!” a voice called. Hazel. “Leave them alone.” I looked up to spot the pinkette stalking over to us. Mark got up and left, grumbling as he did so. Hazel scowled at his retreating back.

  “Sorry about him. He’s a douche, but we got paired up anyway. You really don’t need assholes like him bothering you right now.”

  “Um… ok… I just wanna eat my lunch in peace.”

  “Oh! Ok. Yeah, that’s fair. I’m, uh… gonna go home. Got stuff to do with my girlfriend.” She stood up and left as well.

  Ok, something’s up, right?

  That’s two people who think I look different, and one of them, as well as some Timmy’s employee, thought I looked like a girl.

  Surely Harry’s batshit theory held no weight? Surely not!

  I made my way down the stairs to the nearest bathroom, which was, fortunately, completely empty. I leaned over the sink, inspecting my reflection.

  Immediately, something jumped out at me. I didn’t… hate my reflection. That was odd. Usually I would rather not look at myself, but, for whatever reason, this Monday afternoon, I found myself feeling more ok with what I was seeing in the mirror.

  It wasn’t exactly good, though.

  Looking in the mirror also begged the question of when the st time I shaved was. I was pretty sure that I hadn’t shaved that morning, but, if I hadn’t, I should expect to see red stubble all over my cheeks, chin, and neck. There was none of that. Instead, all I could see was smooth, bare skin. I ran my hand over it, wondering if I was hallucinating or something, but no – there was nothing.

  And, I couldn’t be entirely sure, but my face was definitely looking a little different. I was, like, ninety-nine percent sure of that, at least. Unfortunately, unless I wanted to hunt through my mom’s Instagram, which could take a while, I didn’t have any pictures to compare to, so I was stuck with nothing more than a gut feeling that something was up.

  Harry’s idea popped into my head yet again, but I dismissed it. I didn’t look like a girl, I just looked… kind of cute? Like, cute for a guy, that is. My hair was still messy as all hell, and I half-heartedly tried combing a hand through it. No luck, it was way too tangled.

  I huffed in annoyance at my stubborn hair, then turned and entered a stall since I actually did kind of need to use the bathroom.

  gayannabeth